Last week, I was at my brother's when his wife called out from the other room, "The computer just turned off, what did you do?" I am paraphrasing since I do not have a photographic memory. Needless to say, it was a little upsetting and I thought, "I am in here and am not using the computer. What did YOU do? It always works fine for me. I will go get it to work no problem, just watch."
Well as it turns out it did shut off and everytime I turned it back on it would start up, but then suddenly shut off before I could even do anything. I decided to stop trying to get it to stay on before I really fried something. Then I used my tablet to look up the problem. The power supply could have gone bad or maybe the inside is covered with dust and it is getting too hot. I was hoping for the dust. I opened the case and score! There was quite a bit of dust on the fans. As I start trying to clean the dust away, I realize there is a bigger problem, the heatsink and mounted fan appear to be loose and hardly in contact with the processor. I unscrew one of four screws on the fan and the fan and heatsink slides right off, the other three screws. Clearly, this is not good. Upon further inspection, I realize that this piece is clearly broken. It must be replaced, but I am prepared to find the least expensive repair shop to save my brother money.
As it turns out the repair shops want the part to be provided and they will do the work. This one place has a flat rate of $120, not too terribly bad. However, that does not include parts. Surely, I thought, someone will do this for $50 (that seems fair) and it will cost less than $100 to get this fixed. Actually the further I searched, the more the price seemed to rise. I convinced my brother to order the part he needed, but I was admittedly worried about how it was going to get into his machine and you know function as intended without paying an exorbitant amount for the hour worth of work. It was looking bleak.
Looking back now (you would not know it, but I started writing this a month ago, so this event took place 5 or 6 weeks ago, I fell asleep the night of writing this and it has been stuck in my drafts ever since), I cannot remember if the parts had arrived yet or not, it took a few days, but my sister-in-law started talking to the neighbor and she then volunteered her husband to do it. Better him than me, I thought, and he will be cheap if he even takes a twenty when offered. Plus he is an electrician by trade, he seemed to be naturally better suited to handle the intricacies of a computer. I hoped the neighbor was as confident about it as I heard his wife seemed to be. I sure did not have confidence I could do it.
The worst that could happen? A failed installation that destroyed something else like the motherboard and left me needing a real technician to identify what I had done and how much it would cost to fix if it could be fixed. Yeah, that is only going to be a few hundred, no need to get a new computer after that, I got this! Better him than me.
Soon my fears were realized. My sister in-law nonchalantly mentioned, I could just change the heatsink fan, if the neighbor could do it surely I could too (I believe that was her thought process). That is solid logic right there I thought, I could get a job as an electrician too infact I could use the money why haven't I done that? *berrrrrrrrrrruhhhhht*
Wrong answer. The crowd goes wild as the visiting team throws up a brick at the buzzer . I am that shooter or I am the guy laying on the ice after getting stick checked by the goalie on a fast break watching helplessly as the puck slides an inch past the post and into the boards, the final horn sounds and my team finishes down a goal.
I try to hide the distress on my face, hoping to feign confidence. "Yes, no problem, I will get it done." Did she buy it, I thought, do not try to read her face she will know something is off. Deep down, I was a little excited. Since I never suggested I could do it, until it was told to me I could, that meant I was off the hook if I screwed it up right, maybe, well? Well shit, that is what; hopefully, I do not screw up. I should be able to do this, but can I?
I always do this I thought. I can do this, I want to do it to prove I can. I just wish I did not hold these reservations, of course this will be easier than I make it sound. It all reminded me of another time where I was left hating myself for my uncertainty. It was just a moment, but it resonates long after the moment passed constantly reminding me of my stupid inadequacies.
I stood over the hood of one of my best friend's older sister's car. Actually it was her, one of her roommates, and myself standing over the car with it's hood raised. They were hoping to add coolant/anti-freeze, the car must have been getting hot. The two of them clearly had no idea what they were doing and likely even stated as much. Trying to be helpful, I pointed out the radiator cap and said, "I think it goes here." I immediately regretted saying this is what I thought and tried to explain why I knew what I thought was right. It got ugly from there, they were both very hesitant to listen to what I thought and wanted someone that knew what they were talking about to tell them what to do. Eventually I stopped trying to assuade them to discover the truth for themselves and I retreated into my head to have an angry dialog about my decision to introduce the uncertainty. It put a damper on the rest of the evening; I probably spent the next few hours withdrawn and angry.That moment haunts me all too regularly. I tried to make this heatsink fan go differently and I was significantly less sure of myself now. However, I did actually managed to complete the project, as I am sure any one reading has long ascertained. The computer has not had a problem since I put the part in. It was rather easy although I did not have completely steady hands, but it did not matter in the end.
