The Source of Inspiration

English 300-8:00 am           Essay #3—Informative              25 June, 2012             M. Aaron Miller

The Source of Inspiration

            A good friend suggested I write about where inspiration comes from.  Despite giving no confirmation that I would take up this task, I have labored endlessly since that moment in nearly constant meditation and contemplation on the subject.  For all these consideration, the page remained blank; my mind had not settled on how to proceed.  The amateur psychologist inside my head wanted to start with the definition.  Inspiration is the conversation, a communication transcending the simple exchange of words, which originates in the heart of one individual and is available for public consumption; for those lucky enough to hear the conversation the impact is felt in their heart.  This means that inspiration is essentially a heart-to-heart, but with no limit to how many hearts get involved.  However, it was evident that the definition alone would not be good enough.  Tension began to mount, I was having some really good ideas, but still not content with anything to begin writing it and time was ticking away.

            That is when something occurred to me, I was afraid.  I was looking for words to fill the page, but there is no such thing as “good enough” and more than just words must fill the page, when writing about inspiration.  Although I knew that I could do that, having done it before; I was afraid, because I also knew what it entailed.  Inspiration is a two-way process one must go through; however, this is commonly over-looked.  Indeed, society refers to inspiration colloquially as the receiving or taking in of something.  However, Isaac Newton’s study of physics has left society with an explanation in his third law of motion: for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.  Inspiration, as society considers it, is only the reaction.

            The action of inspiration is one individual’s personal sacrifice to share a piece of their heart with the world.  This is no small feat, showing the world what one believes in, what one is made of.  Sometimes it can be emotionally taxing, but even when it is not, it tends to leave a person vulnerable and exposed.  This is what I am most afraid of; feeling that much and putting myself out there, not knowing if it will be enough to satisfy my toughest critic, myself.

            The reaction of inspiration allows for a choice: we can either open ourselves up to its affects or downplay its significance.  It feels as if fear has pigeonholed me into the latter of these two for far too long.  There was a time when my heart was open, ready to receive inspiration; this was before cynicism took control.  Just as with Santa or the Easter Bunny, somewhere along the way, one may stop believing and when that happens the magic dissipates.

            Thus far, I have explained what inspiration is and how it is effectively a process.  Now to answer the question at hand, ‘Where does inspiration come from?’  I believe inspiration comes from everywhere and anyone.  It starts in the heart and originates from honesty.  It stems from those among us that believe in something so completely that it is felt through our actions.  In conclusion, this is what I know about inspiration: it is a two-way process (both sharing and receiving), how it influences us is our choice, and it is the intimate conversation between two hearts.

 Having said these things, I wish to introduce a conversation, from the heart of Meghan Vogel, recently shared in the news (I recommend my readers also read at least one of the articles quoted here, to be more fully immersed in the conversation):  “[Vogel] committed one of the most selfless acts of the year on the track: She stopped running the 3,200-meter final to help along a foe who had collapsed just 20 feet from the finish line” (Smith, 2012).  “Within 20 feet of the finish line, Arden McMath, a sophomore from Arlington High School, collapsed in front of Vogel. Rather than run by her, Vogel helped McMath to her feet and helped her across the finish line” (Long, 2012).    It might be what anyone would do in that situation, but not just anyone will be granted the opportunity.  When Meghan had to make the decision to help a foe or keep running, she did what she knew was right and in that action her honest belief was manifest.

References

Long, D. (June 5, 2012). WLS state champ lends a helping hand. Springfield News-Sun. Accessed online, June 25, 2012: http://www.springfieldnewssun.com/springfield-oh-sports/high-school-sports/wls-state-champ-lends-a-helping-hand--1385613.html

Smith, C. (June 5, 2012). Ohio runner stops in state final to aid fallen opponent. Prep Rally blog. Accessed online, June 25, 2012: http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/highschool-prep-rally/ohio-runner-stops-state-final-aid-fallen-opponent-100722161.html

Getting One's Just Compensation

English 300-8:00 am             Argumentative Essay             11 June, 2012             M. Aaron Miller

Getting One’s Just Compensation

            As a society, we believe that companies should be fair in their dealings with employees; all workers should receive just compensation for their work.  Some companies will pay its workers as little as they can get away with.  However, most of the time if a company does this for a prolonged period of time one of two things will happen, the company will lose quality employees to higher paying firms or those employees come together and demand better from the employer.  What-if the majority of a corporation’s workers did not have to be paid; what-if there were rules and regulations in place that protected a business from having to pay qualified and eligible individuals.  This is happening all around the United States and some of these companies can pay supervisors and motivators exorbitant amounts.  Is it right or is it an injustice?  Since I am referring to the student-athlete, our society has accepted this reality.  However, the question emerges: should we continue to exploit the talents and hard work of young men and women for nothing more than an opportunity; a chance that if all goes well, if that young person is lucky, they can turn either turn their talents into a career or trade them for an education?  The answer is no; I believe that in fairness to student-athletes, society should consider paying these athletes for their contributions.  The first step will be opening the lines of communication and working together to make this idea a reality.

            In an effort to squelch the topic before becoming a legitimate discussion, many people jump to the hasty conclusion that student-athletes receive scholarships and that is their compensation.  With this argument, I cannot completely disagree; however, not all student-athletes receive scholarships or even a “full-ride”.  Although for the students that do receive a full scholarship, the time commitment of playing collegiate sports often prevents the opportunity that many other college students have.  Which is to seek gainful employment; this includes those individuals that receive academic scholarships.  Therefore, I believe scholarship athletes should not be the reason we dismiss the discussion, but simply a situation among student-athletes we must keep in mind when having this discussion.

            Another generalization we should avoid is visualizing athletes as football, baseball, and men’s basketball.  I know for me, I grew up on a baseball diamond and I love to watch football and men’s basketball; however, I realize these are not the only athletes that go to college.  We should consider a student-athlete as anyone that plays a university sponsored sport under the authority of an athletic department.  Therefore, I suggest we must also consider those athletes that participate in volleyball, golf, swimming, cheerleading, and etc.  Any payment to athletes should avoid preferential treatment for the sport in which that athlete plays.

            One thing that I do not want to see if we were to start paying athletes is a change in the dynamic of the sport.  I think a difference in pay scales among universities has the potential to do this.  It would be detrimental if only the best athletes went to the best paying universities.  Not all of athletes are utilized and it would be a shame if some of the nation’s best did not get playing minutes or sat the bench for four years, simply because their teams were “too deep”.  If this were to happen, it would leave other teams with less talent than they have now and it would no longer be competitive between these teams.

I admit that I do not have some big plan; I do not know that anyone currently has a plan for the idea of paying athletes to work “across the board”.  I do, however, believe it is definitely in societies’ best interest to give the issue consideration; to attempt to understand the various perspectives and prepare a plan that will work. I leave you with this, my hope that we, as a society give this topic some serious consideration; I say this as someone that loves sports and as an individual that could have benefited, both academically and socially, had the opportunity of being a paid athlete existed.  How many more individuals are out there that could benefit from the experience of playing collegiate athletics, but cannot afford to stop working?  We do not only need to talk about this for the athletes being paid, we need to discuss this for the students that were not permitted to reach for their potential.

Tear Drops covering the Page

English 300-8:00 am       Essay One-Personal Narrative             06/07/2012        M. Aaron Miller

Tear Drops covering the Page

            I must admit my memory passes quickly.  I have heard others speak of the brain as a filing system for memories.  In this, perhaps is some truth and my brain is the one place I cannot stand clutter.  Memories are tossed in a bin for sorting where they exist for a short time in full disclosure; these are then filed away without me knowing if the memory will ever be retrieved again or maybe it even ceases to be, thrown in a trash bin, a non-existence.  A few memories I hold onto, these pop up when I think about major events in my life.  These are turning points or especially difficult tribulations, which as one might say represent an aspect of the many things that make me who I am today.  Allow me to describe one such incident in as much detail as recollection permits.

            I was still so young, only a child.  My childhood was marked by several local re-locations. These, however, did not start until around the 3^rd grade.  Therefore, to put my best guess forward:  I am in the third grade.  We moved in the middle of that year, remaining within walking distance of my old school.  It was decided that I would continue going to the same old school until the new school year began.  I remember vividly living in that house then.  I know that I was in the family room, likely sitting on the couch.  I have never typically used a desk, and I do not remember a table being in that room.  I sat there diligently doing my homework, because that is what good boys do of course! However, I felt as if the work was all quite trivial.  Since the subject was English, I needed to rewrite the entire sentence and only doing something simple like adding a word, comma, or rearranging the sentence for structural purposes.  I began thinking things like, “this is ridiculous why all this work for only little corrections”.  As it went on like that, I began to wonder when it would all be over.  Continuously I am thinking, this is such a pointless task, it is not like I do not know how to do it.  Still I look and there are so many problems left.  Again I think, “This is pointless”.  One after the other I am plugging along, but the work appears to be the exact same, only the book is using different sentences and I have to write them all out.  My hand, I feel, is starting to cramp and the problems keep going on, forever.  I cannot stop the thoughts, “These problems are so ridiculous the only thing they prove is that I am willing to do the stupid homework simply because I am told to”, “Ouch it hurts to write.  Just do it, keep writing”, and “Oh great, that is barely readable.  There really is no point in this stupid homework and I am not even going to get credit because no one is able to read it.”

            I sought insight and wisdom from my parents surely they would know what I should do.  Much to my dismay they thought I should get the homework done despite both its uselessness and my developing condition.  I continued the struggle, forcing myself to write, trying to ignore the pain.  I tried changing the way I wrote so it would not hurt as much, so those muscles that did hurt could try to relax.  But this awkwardness only caused me to clench the pencil tighter and the pain began to become greater.  At some point, the tears welled up in my eyes.  I wanted understanding from my parents and I again cried out to them through my pain.  They were full of compassion, but they only offered the same understanding I had given myself and that was beginning to fail.  And so in this moment, as the tears streamed down my face and my hand throbbed in pain I began to despise that pointless act of submission.

           To this day I cannot recall whether I ever finished the homework that night.  It must not have been important; it had no impact on me passing the 3^rd grade.  I cannot even remember if I later had similar instances with homework, possibly with the same teacher.  What I can decisively state:  to this day I do not like homework, unless it helps me better understand the process of solving a problem, but then once I understand something, I do not see any benefit of further homework.  These struggles oft make me feel as if I am of inferior ability, despite later experiences having suggested otherwise.  I, perhaps, have assimilated the entire English Department into this angst, because now for my own reasons I do not like the English dept. here at Western Kentucky University.  It has been a constant struggle getting in all three English general education courses; because, there are not enough courses offered and rarely does an open class fit into a full schedule of other courses.  This is compounded by a policy of the English department to never, under any circumstance, add a student if the class is not open.  All these experiences I have shared are contrary to the fact that I enjoy writing, and reading.  I am easily touched, or moved to show feeling, by a good book.  And I hold to the dream that I could write something that is capable of touching or moving others.  As I begin this new journey, this session of English 300, with these blank pages before me; I am filled with hope.  The hope that this course will bring me one step closer to my dreams; that the little boy, tears in his eyes and pain from his hand to his heart, will regain confidence long lost and start writing the story he was meant to share.

Too much thinking

I have not been writing enough.  I never stop thinking about writing, but as I have said before the problem is taking some of the time spent thinking and actually writing some of it down.  All the thought in the world is pointless if you do not actually get it down on paper, or computer screen.  Outside of just writing, I have a lot that needs to be accomplished.  It seems like that is a constant.  The semester ends and I am expecting some big break and it turns out to be more of a mental vacation than an actual break.  It has been three weeks since fall semester ended.  I took a May session class, which means I have been in class starting the Monday after finals week.

In May session, I had been taking Psy 301, Statistics.  Of course I aced it, I only missed two questions the entire session.  The first one I got right, but missed two points for not showing how I got the degrees of freedom, which is a fairly autonomic calculation that one should not be required to write out, n'est-ce pas?  The second question I did not understand, I felt it was a confusing question, of course it was not a calculation.  I know now what the professor was looking for and I felt my response was incorrect, but it was not so far off base that it could not have been correct if I understood the question. Therefore, I give myself a pass, especially considering the question could be revised.  I must say, this class got me thinking that I should have probably gone into statistics.  I mean yes, I had statistics before: Econ 206 (Descriptive statistics), Econ 306 (Inferential statistics), and Psy 361 (measurement, not really stats, but still aced it <enter appropriate emoticon here>).  I aced each and every one and I noticed others struggle and this is unfathomable.  The way I see it, there are two possibilities, statistics is not hard or I am just good at statistics.  Although it is probably the former and not the latter, I cannot help but recall all those that seem to struggle with it.  Nevertheless, it is not too late for a career in statistics, but I am not sure what jobs I might qualify for and have the ability to perform in entry-level and I really do not have the resources to further my educational endeavors at this time, graduate school.

Now it is a new session and for me another course:  English 300.  It will be a miracle if I ace this course!  Do you believe in miracles?  I have not been looking forward to this and I am still not ready for it, but will I ever be more ready?  To be fair, what I write is not (always) bad.  I mean, there are obvious mistakes that I sometimes make and part of that has to do with the incompatibility between my brain and the computer.  I am not going to conduct a root-cause analysis, but I am good at typing, therefore, that is not the problem.  I DO have a big problem with editing, I feel that I could edit all day long and still not be satisfied and I usually DO NOT write quickly enough to edit all day.  Usually I finish my paper and never go back and edit it.  This happens for two reasons, one I am writing it and when I finally finish it is time to turn it in or two I finish a little bit early and I am too tired of it to look it over one last time.  I will inevitably look it over again, but after the fact I may only make mental corrections.

@>~`~,~~

I just got side-tracked.  Refreshing my thought process: write more, no break, stats, eng, hmmm.  I think I let myself get distracted because this was not going where I wanted it to and it was going to be difficult getting it back there and I already spent a lot of time on it.  I only partially remember what I wanted to say.

Okay well more and more is coming back to me.  I think the problem is I have a lot I am thinking about and not all of it is related.  Some will just have to be ignored.

~~`~,~<@

I have 5 essays (two-page maximum) and a research paper (eight-ten pages) to write in the next month.  My problem for the essays is clearly not writing two pages, it is writing something of substance in under two pages!  The worst part is that I pick the topics, at least from my current understanding.  We did have our first meeting today but the first day rarely accomplishes much except looking over the syllabus (probably so they know everyone looks at it at least once) and everything else a professor wants to hand out (I only say that because today our professor handed out: policies, syllabus, rules, guidelines, schedule, suggestions, etc.  We had 4 hand-outs and two of them were single sheets with something different on the front and back.  However, the first essay is due on Thursday, so I guess I better get writing.  This session is going to fly by, it will be nearly over shortly after it begins.  It would be ideal to post my writing assignments here before they are due and then any feedback would be welcome.  Of course, that would require me to get on top of this and get them written right away.  I will make that a goal, but do not feel bad if I don't follow through.  I still have some stuff I was planning on posting last semester that I need to take care of; I usually compose blog posts in the blogger so when I decide it is as ready as it is going to get, all I have to do is click post and forget it or re-read it and then forget it.  Anyway, if anyone does have suggestions for topics I could write about for English 300, feel free to let me know.  I have very few ideas right now.  Plus, I would be more inclined to post my paper here after getting the topic from you all!

Now let us take this full circle back to where this was supposed to go and avoid the tangent that is lingering in my brain (perhaps save it for another post).  I have been "neglecting" the blog as of late.  I say that, because I check it practically everyday and I also get instant e-mail notification of comments etc.  However, it really is not going to do anything without me posting regularly.  You read that right, I check it everyday, it keeps up with statistics and I am addicted to them.  I can look at my view count and tell you if anyone has been here since I last checked (likely a couple hours ago).  I know it is pretty sad with a tiny bit of hyperbole.  Nevertheless, my stat check habit is partially what has me discouraged (my LinkedIn profile typically has pathetic stats, fyi).  For the most part, I write for me, but there is not a lot of point in doing that unless I am writing something worth reading.  I am fairly random and outside of those that know me and realize this, I am not sure there is much enjoyment for those few that do happen to read my posts.  Part of this is based on an assumption, but I think there might be some truth to it (based on the data <exclamation> or my analyses thereof).  Put simply, there is room for improvement and that is where my head is at.

Thanks for reading.